A couple of months ago it dawned on me. My libido was gone.
Now this is a big deal for me. I always had a crazy big libido. Three times a day, yes please. It seemed to have been the only good thing about this messed up body at times. Now looking back there was probably even a messed up reason for this super high sex drive. Guess I lived in overdrive for a long time. It might be connected to methylation (it is said undermethylators have a high libido. From the rest of the symptoms for undermethylation I fit quite well too. So does a reduced libido now mean I am not an undermethlyator anymore? Or does it mean I exhausted my adrenals - probably the latter). When did it start? About 1,5 years ago my libido was still high I would say. Then I left for a 6 months journey travelling the world (and as much as not working and just travelling and seeing beaches etc sounds like super relaxing, it is actually quite a lot of stress you put on your body. Not too many healthy meals, many flights, time differences... for somebody like me who is prone to stressing out and anxiety, this was a big challenge. Glad I did it though!). During my travels I had already really low sex drive but I put that down to the stress. But then I came back and it kinda continued. Although the first weeks I was back it actually got sky high again. Maybe because I didn't have sex in so long and the first weeks I stayed with my good friend, with whom I had shared the bed for some time already. We got a real strong sexual connection, so at first all was good. But then it got less and less. We still had sex and I still enjoyed it very much, but I wasn't really horny in between. I could take it or leave it. Which might actually be a good thing! I hear guys saying it was such a relief for them when they entered their 50's and weren't ruled anymore by their dick. But I was only 36 and I must say I missed being randy. Is it an age thing? Lately as I have been exploring Pyroluria again etc I got the hope that it is just a massive zinc deficiency. I realised I have white spots on my nails again which is a big indicator zinc deficiency. I hadn't supplemented much zinc, and let's face I didn't eat much red meat. Stress massively depletes magnesium AND zinc, and while I always supplemented magnesium (which probably is a reason why my anxiety levels are so low these days), I had kinda neglected the zinc. So I started taking zinc and pretty quickly ramped it up to 50 mg. Oh dear, massive copper dumping came my way, with crazy headaches, sleep paralysis and nightmares and just an overall feeling of losing my marbles. Sweet. I backed down with the zinc and sloooowly started again. This has been a few weeks now. Libido still pretty much zero. Reaching an orgasm takes forever. I know, this is an issue for many women actually, and I believe that many people are heavily zinc deficient. Just looking at a bodybuilding online forum and see how many of those guys supplement with zinc and say it makes them better men! Stress depletes zinc, exercising like lifting heavy weights depletes zinc, infections deplete zinc - I came to the conclusion that everybody probably needs zinc and magnesium in their lives. Thanks to my love for sex I dove deep into research again, and via Zinc and Pyroluria I also came across Mitosynergy and how copper toxic people are also most likely deficient in copper. Actually some numbers say about 80 % of the population are deficient in copper (the bioavailable that is) because our soils are depleted, and really who is eating enough leafy green vegetables. Plus, if your liver and adrenals are tanked, your body has difficulties producing ceruloplasmin, the protein-carrier that makes copper bioavailable. So if your body cannot use the copper you are taking in, it stores it as toxic copper, and that causes a host of issues. Women are especially prone to copper toxicity due to higher estrogen levels. Add to that IUD (copper spirals for contraception), you have a recipe for disaster. Anxiety, paranoia, hormonal imbalances. So Mitosynergy claims to be the first bioavailable copper that goes directly into the cells. I looked it up and it sounds legit so - obviously - I ordered me a sample. It is bloody expensive (as with most things that work) but whatever it takes. So I am kinda grateful for losing my libido as it brought back my awareness to the imbalances in my body. Adrenals of course are a big part of the journey too. I think I massively tanked them because when I came back from my world travels I started the Iodine Protocol (more about that in a different post) which is really hard on the adrenals. That was also when I gained a ridiculous amount of belly fat, and had crazy energy crashes. It's all about balance. The puzzle continues. Oh, and don't get me started on how Maca has increased your libido like crazy, blah blah. Yeah. No. Didn't do it for me, which just shows how deep I seem to be in the shit, haha. I still take it regularly for supporting my adrenals though, plus many other adaptogens.
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